Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Lesson #44: You can't predict the future

Even though Lyndon and I are married, pay bills, and actually have health insurance, we haven't quite hit the real world.  Student loans help cover our rent and utilities, we get tax breaks because I'm a student, and neither of us have found our careers yet.  We're kind of in this weird state between being college students and being forced to be grown-ups.  All of that, however, is going to change very shortly.

We thought the real world would have hit us much sooner, but through some unfortunate events, I'm not graduating this semester.  Instead of doing my internship last summer, like we were hoping, it won't be happening until this summer.  That internship will be another stepping stone towards more responsibilities and more "adult life."  We have to go apartment hunting, move off campus, pay rent and utilities every month . . . fun stuff.

The following is a list of problems that are keeping us from discerning where God wants us next.

1.  I don't have an internship yet.  There are only three months left until the summer, and I still don't know where I'll be.  There's one possibility right now (we're meeting tomorrow), but that's just a possibility and that's just one possibility.  Everything about our future is dependent on this internship.  Finding another apartment is the next step we need to take, and we can't even begin apartment hunting until I know where I'll be.

2.  Lyndon was recently promoted, but we're not sure if that promotion includes a raise.  He was so good at his previous job that he might've ended up making more per hour than he does with this new job.  A promotion should include a pay increase, but that might not be the case.

3.  The job that Lyndon has might not be his career.  He's not sure yet.  When we were dating, he was pursuing a different path that provided financial security for our lives.  He's not pursuing that anymore, and  that kind of pulled the rug out from underneath me.  He doesn't know what his future holds career wise.

4.  I have to make money this summer.  Our bills are going to get bigger and more numerous.  The never ending awfulness that comes with bills is going to increase.  I need to help my husband bring home the bacon, but we have no idea how that's going to work.  If my internship isn't willing to pay me (some internships offer that, some don't), they have to understand that I need to get a part time job in addition to my responsibilities with them.  I worked at a great daycare this past summer who would be more than willing to offer me hours if available, but I can't tell them anything yet.

Let me make one thing clear: my husband takes care of me.  We might not be living in the lap of luxury, but we have never been in dire financial straits.  He's been able to give me things beyond the bare essentials, and I am forever grateful for that.  My man works hard to provide, and he's done a great job thus far.

After a few breakdowns the past couple weeks, Lyndon has confidently reassured me that I don't have to worry.  He has bravely stepped up as my husband and has told me that he will always take care of me, no matter what.  I know that I can breathe easy because he will make sure that I am safe, happy, and protected.

Now we just have to bolster our faith in God, knowing that He will lead us to where we should go.

Lame video.  Awesome message.

Lord I surrender all 
To Your strong and faithful hand
In everything I will give thanks to You
I’ll just trust Your perfect plan

When I don’t know what to do
I’ll lift my hands
When I don’t know what to say
I’ll speak Your praise
When I don’t know where to go
I’ll run to Your throne
When I don’t know what to think
I’ll stand on Your truth
When I don’t know what to do

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Lesson #43: Hostess with the "Mostest"

I enjoy hosting.  Having people over and taking care of them is what I truly love doing.  There's something about inviting people into my home, taking care of them, and showing them love that gets to me.  It's so great.  I'll take their coats, have food, get them drinks . . . I go all out.  Tonight, we had around 15 people in our teeny apartment to celebrate a friend's parents driving all the way from Montana to surprise her with a visit.  Another friend brought most of the food, we pooled our utensil resources, and there were plenty of mugs for hot chocolate and coffee (because winter is finally here!).  I had a blast.  And they did the dishes for me.  You can't top that.

The idea of hosting is a sort of "opposites attract" situation for Lyndon and me.  He would rather come to a quiet home where he doesn't have to worry about others.  If he can be fed, see his wife, and play video games all night, it's been a good day.  He's a man who enjoys his quiet time and gets it as often as he can.  It's not that he doesn't like people; he's more of an introvert who values his peace.  Because of this introvert tendency he has, we don't have people over as often as I would like.

Our group had to rearrange our original plans because of weather, and part of that change was meeting at our apartment instead of a restaurant.  I said it was fine without checking with him, so I was a little nervous.  He called me from the armory when they were on a break, and I cautiously told him the new plans.  He was incredibly gracious and had no problem with it.  I had dodged a bullet and just had to get my lazy butt up to clean before I was home free.

Growing up, my mom taught us to clean for guests.  It didn't matter how clean or how dirty our house was.  If people were coming over, we were cleaning.  Vacuuming, dusting, sweeping . . . any form of cleaning you could think of was done.  That is something that has stuck with me, so most of my day was spent cleaning around the apartment (Lyndon was certainly grateful).  I didn't even care that my day went to cleaning.  The cleaning meant that people were coming over, and yes, the apartment did need to be cleaned - win-win situation.

We were cramped, it got so warm inside that Taylor opened the back door, it was noisy, the kitchen was a mess (until the wonderful guests cleaned), and I loved every moment of it.  I don't ask to invite people over as often as I would like.  I try and stay very conscious of Lyndon's need for alone time.  I'm thankful that he's conscious of my hostess genes, too.

Now I just have to wait as long as I can before asking him if we can have people over again.